as I sit in the comforts of my home
I peer through the looking glass and see a man with two shopping carts full of stuff
everything he owns
he sits, head bowed down, defeated and suffering
occasionally coming up for air
he’s cold and shaking
from another night with no home
his mind going round and round
repeating the same story
he is lost in a storm of I don't knows
victimized by his woes
as I sit contemplating this man’s sadness, I see my inner child’s shopping cart full of stuff
a life piled in stacks of memories
she sits, weeping in the back of her mother’s sedan
confused by the presence of a begging man
it’s her first time seeing the truth of a world rooted in suffering
she feels helpless, cold, and starts shaking
awakening her mother to empathy
she learns the less fortunate deserve attention and care
as a buddha is born, a toothless smiling man
blossoms of spontaneity bear fruit when shared
as I place my romantic epiphanies in an envelope stuffed with words and sealed with a kiss for those who laugh at their own ego tricks and trips
I imagine a world of united minds
hearts turned on, forward thinking, and beaming
transcending greed and competing
no anxieties or insecurities, just jaw dropping awakenings
playful giggles, friends, and jungle gyms
scraped knees, hurt feelings, and endless dreams
learned things that no longer serve and unlearned things that truly were
the presence we project, constantly fading
the journey into soul, the only thing lasting
Recommended read: Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl
I long for thee
I long for the strength to go against the resistance building within me.
The conflict between listening to my mind or listening to my heart is on going.
In my society, it is prized to have pride in egoistic achievement.
In my heart, it is prized to have pride in limitless compassion.
As I sit in solitude, butt to the ground and my legs crossed,
spine upright and taut from years of commitment
I can’t help, but allow, the faces of my past and present to visit
like friendly ghost, they come and go
I long for the courage to overcome the coward within me.
The conflict between making excuses or doing is daily.
In my mind, the voices of my community, saying what I can and cannot do.
In my intuition, the voices within me are singing harmonies that counter balance negativity.
As I walk in solitude, connecting with my breath
head raised and smiling in gratitude from years of discipline
I can’t help, but allow, the projections of my past and present anxieties to visit me
like scared ghost, they remain in the dark shadows and do not scare me
I no longer long for the power to transmute the insecurities within me.
The conflict between standing in my Truth or denying has come to an end.
The lion roared and dissolved such misunderstandings.
Now, I long to spread bliss with the light of knowing dharma's existence .
Recommended read: The Lion’s Roar by Chogyam Trungpa
for your presence
for your smile
for your continued support
You fill my world with joy and wonder as you bring in so many different energies, occasionally quite conflicting, mostly incredibly enriching as we discover one another in a vulnerable setting, where we put our nervous vibes out on the line, willing knowing the pain of this piercing is coming, yet you open yourself up and trust, which I am profoundly grateful for. I appreciate your trust in me. I see this connection between our two beings as a sacred place of initiation into the warrior Spirit.
My favorite is when all ego’s are set aside, and we have a meeting of our two minds
This is absolute bliss
a rare connection
of present moment awareness
Our energies align and the magic of Spirit reigns divine, and the flame of authentic expression and personal empowerment continues to burn!
“Do you know orange Dharma?”
“Yes. I know Dharma.”
These are the first words exchanged between two strangers. One of indigenous decent, a Peruvian man and the other is me, the owner of Chief. We are in Iquitos, Peru; a place in the middle of the Amazon rainforest, full of real deal mysticism. It is a place of dark magic, as well as sacred light work and healing.
I fled there unexpectedly for deep spiritual help. It was two and a half years into running Chief with my grand purpose to create space that would allow my beliefs to become an active place of meditation and allow Spirit to express itself through a multitude of mediums connected to such an establishment.
Well, that purpose came true, and it was killing me. That purpose was also making me. The stresses of owning and operating a business with my big buddhist heart was slowly deteriorating my insides; specifically my gut and heart. Despite this, I was still able to make it with grace, which was opening me to ideas and depths of experience I had only read about.
Now.. this Wheel.
This Wheel of me, you, them, they, he, she, and all sentient beings revolving around all of our cosmic debts created from everyday decisions; blind to the divine, which is that you have a soul and it tells you which way to go. It even holds your hand while it leads you home, which is joyous bliss and goodness for fucks sake!
How do we not know this?! How are we operating? Where are we coming from when we speak? How can we say that we really know anyone else when we fail to know our true self and haven’t the courage to look into our own true depths and motives?
I’ve read about it. That soul connection that seems only for the yogi and the buddhist, the buddhist taoist, the enlightened, but no way could that be for me. No way I’ll be able to touch that truth of understanding. It’s too woo woo, so it just will not do.